April 15 2014
He doesn’t know it yet.
I wonder how he would react. We hushed the matter some years back. BJ is all grown and I’m way up in my career. More so, he is always traveling these days. Can I do this?
His momsie would be so mad at me if I should do something stupid, that is if I spill this …this milk before it is fully formed.
It was painful the last time. I even gave him options. The part where I said I would leave instead of watch us break really hurt him. I cannot put him through such again. He said we would pull through it all together.
Well, I could never have done it alone and even if I did, I would not be in this state.
Keeping my fingers crossed.
To you little bumpkin, I’m not confident in you. You’ll be my secret till you decide to let out. I won’t be the one breaking anyone’s heart. Do it yourself.
This diary would just be a piece of you should you turn out to be …
Good night. I can’t really remember the last time I wrote my thoughts down. It feels like I’m cleansing my soul. I’ll do my best to update you.